Owen Valentine 
Many of us know about the classic “Yanny vs. Laurel” audio debate, but could there be more to the story than we have previously thought?
Nothing brings a community out quite like a bipartisan divide: “Blue and Black Dress vs. White and Gold Dress,” “Xbox vs. PlayStation,” and even “Crips vs. Bloods.” In May 2018, nothing at the time was dividing America as much as the classic “Yanny vs. Laurel” debate. In a now ancient audio clip, a voice recording of an opera singer pronouncing the word “Laurel” went absolutely viral for its seemingly similarly sounding pronunciation to the word “Yanny.” What was an originally playful debate, soon turned into an all-out warfare. Fights on the streets, friend groups breaking apart, and people calling each other awful things like “stupid” or “idiot.” While rampage and carnage were ripping through families and communities, people forgot to consider the heart of the discourse, just who were Yanny and Laurel?
Laurel was always the star of the show. In the original Yanny vs. Laurel poll, users voted hearing Laurel a whopping 15% more than those who heard Yanny. So, it might not surprise you to hear that Laurel was actually a strong independent black woman. Growing up in Mississippi in the 1950s, Laurel had faced hardships her entire life. In the middle of the civil rights movement, she understood that nothing was stronger than community. Power comes not from violence, but from your willingness to unite and forge bravery in the gaze of misfortune. Laurel lived her life unapologetically, as she knew she wasn’t getting any handouts. Laurel had to work for everything, nothing came naturally, which made her a perfect foil for Yanny.
While there have been no official photos posted online, many users described seeing Yanny as someone with big, beautiful eyes, almost gazing through your soul. I like the sound of that, let’s keep exploring. Yanny was what you might call a savant; she was exemplary at anything she touched. And because she was white, she didn’t have to face racism or anything like that. She was said to have really liked The Color Purple, both the color and the book/play/musical/movie. One user on reddit explained, “Yanny was the type of person who could just light up a room. Her jokes always exploded in laughter, her conversation always insightful, and she would talk to just about anyone, even if you were ugly.” Yanny was an all powerhouse of a personality, so it doesn’t surprise me that her spirit was so dominant. You see, there is a little more to this story than you may think. Did I mention that Yanny is dead?
One evening in 2007, Yanny was partying at a bar in Knoxville, Tennessee. It had just passed 2:00am, and the bars all over the city were starting to close. Laurel, surprisingly enough, was also in the area. She had been meeting up with her old friends in Mississippi for a funeral luncheon, and it had run a little long. Laurel was waiting at the bus stop to go back to her hotel, where she had seen Yanny stumbling out of the Taco Bell Cantina. As the story goes, Yanny started bickering with Laurel:
Y: “You seem like you need to have more fun, girl.”
L: “The days of retribution are upon us, only in the light of Heaven will I achieve the merriment that I do not deserve; but what I will receive from his holiness.”
Y: “You’re weird, bitch.”
L: “Look into your soul and tell me if your reflection matches what you give voice to in this world.”
Yanny attempts to slap Laurel but misses and falls into the oncoming traffic.
Laurel sprang into action, attempting to resuscitate Yanny. She called 911 and accompanied Yanny to the nearest hospital. 2 hours later Yanny would be pronounced dead. Laurel had felt a pit taking shape in her soul, not only forming from the encounter she had witnessed, but also from the powerful spirit that was already starting to curse her. The tale says that from that day forward, any interview mentioning Laurel had a strange audio effect that made it sound like the cursed name “Yanny” was being pronounced over it. It is my personal theory that Yanny became some sort of digital ghost because the bus had mechanical components.
Yanny has forever cursed Laurel, so anytime you listen to “Yanny vs. Laurel,” I want you to ponder why people are hearing two different names, and wonder if beautiful Yanny will ever get her corrupt retribution.
Drafty's Desk Drawer | Issue 3